Comments
Baltimore needs programs like this to show that they are serious about tackling these issues and priciples from every day school and all Rabbonim better attend .
To Concerned Survivors, Rabbis,
Therapists and Advocates
YOU ARE CORDIALLY INVITED TO
A NATIONAL CONFERENCE ADDRESSING
SEXUAL ABUSE IN THE ORTHODOX COMMUNITY
By Invitation Only
September 21, 2008
11:00 AM – 6:00 PM
Young Israel of Avenue I
Corner of Avenue I and Coney Island Avenue
Brooklyn, NY 11230
Please R.S.V.P.
or call 917-826-4713
Suggested Contribution: $36
SCHEDULE
11:00 -11:30 AM COFFEE AND DANISHES
11:30 – 12:00 AM WELCOMING REMARKS: ASHER LIPNER
“Shehcheyanu, Vkeymanu, Vhegeyanu Lazman Hazeh”
12:00 – 12:15 PM T’HILLIM FOR SURVIVORS AND FOR ABUSING RABBIS
12:15 - 12:45 PM KEYNOTE ADDRESS: RABBI YOSEF BLAU
“Lo Taamod Al Dam Reiecha”
Protecting Our Children Not Our Image
12:45 – 1:30 PM LUNCH,
ELLIOT PASIK: THE JEWISH BOARD OF ADVOCATES FOR CHILDREN
RABBI DRATCH –DVAR TORAH
DOV HIKIND – “WHAT’S NEXT?”
1:30 – 3:15 PM FIRST FOUR BREAKOUT SESSIONS
3:15 – 5:30 PM SECOND FOUR BREAKOUT SESSIONS
5:30 – 6:00 PM CONCLUSIONS AND CLOSING REMARKS: ASHER LIPNER, Ph.D
6:00 PM MINCHA
Registration
Please sign the sign- in sheet when you arrive and make your payments to: Asher Lipner, or Ada Moseson who have laid out the money for the shul and the food. The sign-in will also give us a way to stay in touch. Please indicate on it if you wish to have your email and contact information passed out to the other people at the meeting.
Guidelines for participants:
Remember that everyone at this meeting has a lot of expertise and a lot of passion about the subject matter. Therefore, many people will have a lot to say. Please be cognizant of the importance of everyone being heard. Please self regulate the time that you speak.
Show each person speaking respect and compassion. LISTEN to understand!
Stay focused on the questions that are being asked and addressed.
Safety and Security:
Because of the emotionally charged nature of the subject matter of the meeting, there is a possibility that someone might become overwhelmed and even traumatized by some of the intense discussion. Therefore, keep in mind that it is okay, if you need to step out to take a few minutes of break, get some fresh air, a drink or whatever. In addition, there will be 2 professional clinicians assigned to different parts of the day, to whom you can turn if you want to speak to someone about how you are feeling. Please do not be embarrassed to ask for support.
Privacy and Press Coverage:
The journalists involved are professionals and concerned individuals interested in understanding and presenting the issues to promote change with sensitivity and integrity. They are participating ONLY as advocates, NOT as journalists to cover the private meeting. Therefore, everyone can feel completely free to voice their opinions without concern for any publicity. There is always another time and place for such publicity. Now is not the time, and here is not the place.
By the same token, as the subject matter is an extremely sensitive issue, and ALL participants involved are entitled to their privacy, it is exceptionally important that we ALL respect that. We must realize that we do not have the right to discuss who was at attendance unless you specifically have permission from an individual participant to mention their name. If anyone needs clarification or has any questions on this issue, please feel free to approach either Asher Lipner or one of the clinicians on hand.
Prevention
“V’nishmartem Mikol Davar Rah – and you shall guard yourself from all things evil”
Safeguards in rabbinic relationships involving counseling and outreach
Moderator: Rabbi Marc Dratch, President, Rabbinical Council of America, JSAFE
Leah Marinelli, RN The Awareness Center, Monsey, NY
Michelle Friedman, M.D. Psychiatrist, New York, NY
Ruth Levi, Ph.D., Clinical psychologist, Monsey, NY:
Rabbi Yosef Blau, Mashgiach Ruchani
Yeshiva University, New York, NY:
Eeris Kalish New York City, NY
Chaya Rochel Rosenberg, Brooklyn, NY
Esther Rabinowicz, Ph.D., Clinical Psychologist, Brooklyn, NY
Questions:
• What checks and balances can be put in place to make sure that rabbis doing counseling and kiruv cannot abuse their power in these relationships?
• What is the safest and most sensitive way to make known the names of offending Rabbis in order to keep people from unsuspectingly going to them for counseling if there is no APA-like registry to see complaints? How should the media and the internet best be used to in this capacity?
• How can women and children be taught to look for red flags? What are the warning signs that a rabbi is abusive?
• Should the position of rabbi become a licensed profession, or should there be legislation by society to only allow professionals to practice counseling for marital or other psychological problems, etc?
• How can we motivate Smicha programs to institute that rabbis get psychological screening and evaluation as part of their Smicha process to determine what type of position would be best “suited” for them? Can and should it be established that schools and Rabbinical Organization follow suit as part of the process of hiring them or accepting their membership in Rabbinical organizations? Can we devise a way to weed out the abusive rabbis from the respectable and honorable ones through psychological evaluation?
• How can we facilitate cooperation between the police department, child
protective services and the community leaders?
Oversight
“Hakol B’chezkas Sumin Ad SheHakadosh Baruch Hu Meir Es Eyneyhem –
Everyone is considered blind until The Holy One Blessed Be He enlightens their eyes.”
Enlightening our Leaders
Moderators: Sherree Belsky Jewish Board of Advocates for Children,
Long Island, NY
Chaim Lichtenstien, New York, NY
Debbie Fox, LCSW Aleinu Family Resource Center, Los Angeles, CA
Ada Moseson, Jewish Board of Advocates for Children, Brooklyn, NY
Pearl Engelman Mother of survivor of Rabbi Reichman,
Brooklyn, NY
Joel Engelman Survivor rabbinic abuse, Brooklyn, NY
Moshe Preiser, Ph.D., Psychologist, Kings County Hospital,
Brooklyn, NY
Michael Brecher Survivor rabbinic abuse, Baltimore, MD
Questions:
• How to publish a booklet with written piskei halacha AND hashkafa on the issue by yeshivish, chassidish and modern orthodox AND lubavitch gedolim?
• How can we get a “Koyl Koreh” that any form of molestation is wrong and we should have zero tolerance? How do we educate and empower parents to only send their kids to a safe yeshivah that has a reasonable safety plan in place including background checks and reporting policies that encourage rather than discourage victims to report to authorities like the school in Teaneck (TABC)?
• Who best to approach the Gedolim? A group of survivors, Dov’s task force, a group of professionals? It depends on which Gadol? All of the above?
• How do we change the mind of top Moysdos that have taken the opposing side on legislation and lobbied for laws that put children at greater risk?
• How do we lobby our leading Orthodox organizations? Should a petition be put up on a website gathering hundreds of signatures of concerned parents and individuals; a demonstration in front of their office; open letters to the heads of the organizations asking that they do SOMETHING to save Jewish kids?
Awareness
“V’darashta Vechakarta – You shall seek out (the truth) and you shall analyze.”
Research – What exactly are we talking about?
Moderators: Michelle Friedman, M.D. Psychiatrist, New York, NY
Yitzchak Schechter, PsyD., Center for Applied Psychology
Bikur Cholim, Monsey, NY
Amy Neustien, Ph.D. Board of Editors
Journal of Child Abuse, Long Island, NY.
Michael Salomon, Ph.D. Psychologist, Long Island, NY
Gavriel Fagin, LCSW Social worker and Forensic Psychologist, Long Island, NY
Questions:
• How do we get funding for a massive study?
• How can we get it published in a respected journal?
• What questions should be researched? What hypotheses do we already have? Should the focus be on causes and prevention, prevalence and understanding, or on clinical symptoms and treatment?
• How do we get data? Is it good enough to use already collected data from organizations such as Monsey Bikor Cholim, Ohel, MASK, or do we need to obtain new data for a more comprehensive generalized population sample? What are the legalities and logistics of sharing such information?
• If we need more, data, how do we get schools, colleges, shuls etc. to cooperate? Will it require getting the leadership like Torah Umesorah on board to participate?
• What steps need to be taken so that the research findings are not politicized to hurt the cause of prevention and intervention efforts?
• What is the role of qualitative research and how does it inter?
Legislation
“Tzedek, Tzedek Tirdof: Justice, justice shall you pursue.”
Government at work protecting kids: There ought to be a law!
Moderators: Dov Hikind NYS Assemblyman
Elliot Passik, JD Attorney at Law, Long Island, NY
Hella Winston, Ph.D. Journalist, The Jewish Week, New York, NY
Jeff Herman, JD Attorney at Law, Miami, FL
Michael Lesher, JD Attorney at Law, New York, NY
Asher Lipner, Ph.D. Psychologist, Brooklyn, NY
Michael Milch, M.A. Filmmaker, Pittsburgh, PA
Elie Schreiber Office of Assemblyman Dov Hikind, Brooklyn, NY
Shmuel Engelson, CPA Brooklyn, NY
Mark Weiss Survivor of Rabbi Mondrowitz, Higland Park, NJ
Phil Jacobs Baltimore Jewish Times, Baltimore, MD
Elaine Witman, LCSW Director, Shofar Institute, Baltimore, MD
Questions:
• How can we as a community lobby for stronger legislation for school safety, getting rid of statutes of limitations, and instituting mandated reporting for clergy? Do we need a petition on a website, town hall meetings, or a representative group like the Jewish Board of Advocates to go to Albany?
• How can we bring political pressure to bear on Orthodox legislators to protect the children and the rights of survivors?’
• How do we arrange for frum survivors to give testimony for the legislators?
• What can be done to persuade Agudas Yisroel to stop working with the Catholic church on these issues? Do we have lawyers contact them? Do we use the press to debate their positions?
• How can we team up with SNAP to fight the Catholics on these issues?
Survivor Support
“Shviras Hakeilim v’Tikun Olam –
Survivor Support: The shattered vessels and fixing the world
Moderators: Mark Weiss Survivor of Rabbi Avraham Mondrowitz,
Highland Park, NJ
Ellie Hiller Survivor of Rabbi Baruch Lanner, Teaneck, NJ
Legal Support:
Michael Lesher, JD Attorney at Law, New York NY
Jeff Herman, JD Attorney involved in suing the Catholic Church and Yeshiva Torah Temimah, Miami FL
Elliot Passik, JD Attorney suing Satmar Yeshivas
Long Island, NY
Clinical Support:
Chaya Mermerstien, LCSW Beth Israel Hospital’s Helpline for Orthodox Survivors of Incest and Rape
Cheryl Friedman, LCSW Beth Israel’s Helpline, New York, NY
Moshe Preiser, Ph.D. Psychologist, Kings County Hospital, Brooklyn, NY
Naama Yehudah, Ph.D. Association for the Study of Trauma and Dissociation
CommunalSupport:
Hella Winston, Ph.D. Journalist, The Jewish Week
New York, NY
Michael Brecher Survivor of rabbinic abuse, Baltimore, MD
Spiritual Support:
Rabbi Blau Mashgiach Ruchni of Yeshiva University, New York, NY
Questions:
• What clinical, legal, and communal support services do survivors need?
• How can we better advertise and announce the advent of the helpline?
• What are the benefits and risks of “coming forward,” and how can we minimize the risks and maximize the benefits?
• How can we better advertise the clinical services available to reach out to victims in a way that addresses their concerns?
• How can the community make survivors feel part of the tzibbur and help them address their religious conflicts?
• Where can we get funding for training more therapists, and providing affordable treatment?
Education
“Ushmartem Me’od Lnafshoseychem – And you shall verily guard your lives.”
School Safety – Creating abuse free zones
Moderators: Joel Engelman Survivor of rabbinic abuse
Williamsburg, Brooklyn, NY
Debbie Fox, LCSW Director, Aleinu Family Resource Center,
Jewish Family Service, Los Angeles, CA
Tali Strum, JD Ombudsman, Conduct Policy of Board of Directors of Talmudic Academy, Baltimore, MD
Eli Greenwald Parent of former students at Yeshivas Torah Temimah, Brooklyn, NY
Rabbi Meir Rizel Youth Director, Young Israel, Bayswater, NY
Rabbi Marc Dratch Director JSAFE, Executive Committee, RCA
Chaim Lichtenstien New York, NY
Shmuel Engelson, CPA, Brooklyn, NY
Chaim Sender, LCSW, Director, Interborough Clinic, Crown Heights, Brooklyn, NY
Questions:
• What can we learn from each of the following safety plans that is best suited for yeshivas? The boy scouts’, T.A.yeshivah’s, Catholic church’s, Torah Umesorah’s, Public Schools’, Aleynu’s?
• How must it be modified to comply with cultural norms?
• How do we “mandate” mandated reporting?
• Can we develop a curriculum for teaching safety?
• What would it take to develop a kosher sex education by rabbis?
Realization
“Uru Yesheynim Mishinaschem! – Wake up, ye sleepers, from your slumber!”
Community education: Overcoming denial.
Moderators: Elaine Witman, LCSW Director, Shofar Coalition
Baltimore, MD
Phil Jacobs Editor Baltimore Jewish Times
Baltimore, MD :
Ellie Schreiber, Office of NYS Assemblyman Dov Hikind
Michael Shulman Filmmaker, New York, NY
Michael Milch Filmmaker, Pittsburgh, PA
Asher Lipner, Ph.D. Psychologist, Brooklyn, NY
Ada Moseson Jewish Board of Advocates for Children, Brooklyn, NY
Yoni Hikind, LCSW Clinical Social Worker, Brooklyn, NY
Yitzchak Shechter, Psy.D. Director, Center for Applied Psychology
Bikur Cholim Clinic, Monsey, NY
Amy Neustien, Ph.D. Psychologist, Long Island, NY
Questions:
• Who could facilitate an evening to tell parents what really is happening with the molestation problem? What would be the best way to empower parents to responsibly to take a proactive approach within their children’s schools? Who would be the “draw” speaker, and which law enforcement representative would be appropriate to explain the criminal justice side of the problem?
• How can we get Shuls to agree to have workshops for parents?
• What role can the press and media play in creating awareness? Public Service Announcements? Internet websites? Documentary participation?
• What must be done to encourage rabbis to participate in training?
• How to best utilize survivors’ personal testimony as a public education tool.
• Can we use the power of talk radio?
Response
“Hocheach Tochiach Lamisecha” “You shall surely rebuke your neighbor.”
Dealing with the Abusers
Moderators: Gavriel Fagin, LCSW MA, Clinical social worker, Forensic Psychologist, Brooklyn, NY
Jennifer Molinari Representative of Rockland County CPS Brooklyn, NY
Norman Goldwasser, Ph.D. Psychologist, Miami, FL
Ruth Levi, LCSW Psychotherapist specializing in treating
sex offenders, Monsey, NY
Michael Salomon, Ph.D., Psychologist, Long Island, NY
Esther Rabinowicz, Ph.D. Psychologist, Brooklyn, NY
Representative of Child Protective Services, Monsey, NY
Representative of NYPD, Child Abuse Department, Brooklyn, NY
Dov Hikind NYS Assemblyman, Brooklyn, NY
Questions:
What community incentives can we provide for children and parents to come forward to the authorities about an abusive teacher the way they did in Teaneck New Jersey? Should a monetary inducement be offered for information leading to the arrest and conviction of sex offenders?
• Should the community be offering rewards for the information leading to the arrest
and conviction of sex offenders?
• By what means can we persuade sex offenders who have held publicly responsible positions like Mechanchim, Youth Directors, and counselors to publicly apologize and recommend treatment to others (do teshuva)?
• What is the best way of publicizing the psak of Rav Elyashiv about the Mitzvah of reporting to the authorities?
• How can we assure that those criminals who are arrested get into the appropriate therapy/treatment? Who will take the liability to treat those who are high risk for repeat offense? Does it need to be Frum clinicians?
• When does treatment provide enough safety for the community and when is
incarceration necessary?
• How can we facilitate cooperation between law enforcement, child protective services and the community leaders?
Guidelines for Moderators:
1. Be inclusive – make sure that each and every person in the group is heard.
2. Gently limit the time that each person “has the floor”. Try to encourage speakers to be succinct and give someone else a turn.
3. Model for the participants how to listen to each person when they speak and show respect.
4. Stay on course – remember the goal is to arrive at two or three concrete action plans that can be implemented by the people at the meeting in their respective communities.
5. In order to maximize group potential, and bring together the many talents and perspectives, let the group process the ideas being generated and just moderate so one person speaks at a time? Please attend to the questions given to you, allowing for some flexibility as issues come up. Acknowledge for the group that the topics addresses by the various groups will overlap but they should try to stay focused on the topic at hand.
6. Keep good records. Start off by asking for a volunteer to serve as “recorder” to write notes with a special emphasis on group decisions. The most important things to record are the decisions made as to suggested action steps at the community level. At the end of the day, we will read aloud these notes to all of the participants and eventually print out the decisions of each group. Appoint a time-keeper to watch the clock and stay on schedule.
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