Okay, I am telling you upfront this is not going to be a very sexy column.  I guess when you do not have to worry about your finances, gift giving can be sexy and dramatic, but I submit that gift giving on a budget can be fun and meaningful.  Now more than in the past, the stress of holidays need not take an emotional and financial toll.

If a big family dinner is more than you can afford for Hanukkah or New Year’s, consider a pot luck dinner or maybe latkes, jelly donuts, games and token gift giving.  Remember Martha Stewart and Oprah have people on staff who get paid really well to make everything look magical.  We have friends and family who are just as busy and stressed as we are.  Ask for help, keep celebrations low key, and they will be remembered with warmth.

How about thinking low tech?  Maybe instead of Xbox games and Nintendo Wii’s, a good old fashioned board game like Scrabble or Monopoly.  This does require your time and energy, but the outcome in both dollars and family time makes it a win/win investment.

Coupons are great gifts that are really appreciated when redeemed. Last year my niece wanted a Disney movie that I knew she would watch once or twice and then forget about.  So I made two coupons, each for a movie date that included a drink and a snack.  It cost about the same as the movie she wanted from Toys R Us and we had a great time.

The least sexy and most important part of this process is to make a gift budget: make a list of people to whom you want to give gifts and work within your means.  I bit my lip yesterday when the cashier at Wegman’s told the shopper in front of me, “Everyone pays their bills late this time of year.”  There is nothing sexy about being stressed out, endangering your credit and worrying about how to pay for necessities.

Have a happy Hanukkah and a happy, healthy New Year.

By Donna Kane, MA, Jewish Community Services, Baltimore, MD

Jewish Community Services, an agency of THE ASSOCIATED: Jewish Community Federation of Baltimore, offers a wide range of supportive services and resources for you and your family.  To learn more, call 410-466-9200, or visit http://www.jcsbaltimore.org.  Questions about parenting?  Send an e-mail to .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address), and check out the Parenting Tip of the Month at http://www.jcsbaltimore.org.