In a recent syndicated column titled “Nonbelievers, Please Leave Christmas Alone” that ran in The Sun, the great Garrison Keillor takes umbrage with non-Christians who jump on the commercialization bandwagon of what we Jews call “that other December holiday.”

“This is spiritual piracy and cultural elitism, and we Christians have stood for it long enough,” he writes. “And all those lousy holiday songs by Jewish guys that trash up the malls every year, Rudolph and the chestnuts and the rest of that dreck. Did one of our guys write `Grab your loafers, come along if you wanna, and we’ll blow that shofar for Rosh Hashanah’? No, we didn’t.”

Amusing stuff. I’m sure plenty of curmudgeonly Jewish readers were incensed by Mr. Lake Wobegone’s remarks – one Sun reader even condemned the newspaper for printing the column – but Keillor has a point.

Think about it: some of the most popular (and schlocky) Christmas tunes of all time were penned by Jews. Of course, there’s “White Christmas” by Irving Berlin, Johnny Marks’ “Rudolph The Red-Nosed Reindeer” and “A Holly Jolly Christmas,” “Let It Snow! Let It Snow! Let It Snow!” by Sammy Cahn and Jules Styne,” “Silver Bells” by Jay Livingston and Ray Evans, even “The Christmas Song” by Mel Torme – the list goes on and on.

“Christmas is a Christian holiday,” growls Mr. Keillor. “If you’re not in the club, then buzz off.”

OK, so maybe ol’ Garrison needs to take a chill pill. But really, why do we Jews produce these mawkish tunes that have galvanized the masses to contemplate a holiday scenario – one of tinsel and holly and eggnog swilling – that even by our Christian friends’ standards always seems to fall short?

Let’s not forget that most of these songs tend to have melancholy melodies, or at least inhabit a rather lonesome and longing quality, despite the allegedly cheerful and blissful nature of the holiday. I think that comes from our own yearning for all that this holiday promises, even though we know that we can never really fully participate.

I’ve met Jews who have Christmas trees. “It’s just for fun,” they say, “it has nothing to do with the birth of Jesus or Santa or anything. It’s not a religious thing.” Even in my own family, I must confess, there was some gift-giving to young children on December 25th, a desire by my parents that I “shouldn’t feel left out.”

Perhaps we Jews in the Galut are eternally condemned to wishing that we, too, could share in the Yuletide festivities (and perhaps that’s why we’ve made Chanukah into something that it’s not – the Jewish version of Christmas). We have our collective nose pressed up to the glass doors, watching our friends get to enjoy all of the beautiful lights and revelry and trains and delicious food, and of course, the gifts!

Me, I’ve come to appreciate Christmas on a whole different level as an adult. I enjoy it because, well, it has absolutely nothing to do with me. I get to enjoy all the lights and decorations, the cookies and good cheer and such, and yet be relieved of the family stress, travel headaches, gift-buying frenzy and delusional expectations that accompany the holiday. For me, it’s simply a pleasant time of the year that I can turn on and off at will, like a silly Christmas TV special.

I know that Garrison Keillor is merely joking around when he writes that Jews should leave Christmas alone and stop pushing our musical “dreck.” But if our schools and shuls were doing their jobs right all along, would anyone have written these ditties about chestnuts or sleigh bells in the first place?

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Mr. Keilor’s radio show, which I no longer can listen to without wanting to become ill, has become drek itself.

He makes fun of the traditions of the scandavian people of lake wobegon and yet he criticizes Jews.

He criticizes the right wing of the republican party and yet he sounds like them.

Mr. Keilor sounds like he is a card carrying anti-semite these days, and we can do our best to ignore him.

All these other jews, who wrote the christmas music, were non practicing jews as you did not mention. Irving Berlin even went as far as to name his kid Irving Berlin Jr. George Burns was as observant as a ham sandwich. It has a lot to do with the synagogues and the hebrew schools but if it doesn’t start in the homes, then what good is it? The children don’t have the opportunity to learn in shul if their parents don’t go.

But what I do find amusing is I know many once a year jews, who eat traif, observe one or two days of passover and only go to services on the high holy days. However, they send their kids to sunday school at the synagogue.

Oh, well go figure. IF you get a little angry by Mr. Keilor’s comments, as I do, then simply turn him off, but first, write to him and tell him to shut his mouth first!